My husband recently returned from a deployment. During that time I found myself enjoying a new schedule and a few new habits. At night, after I put my two children to bed, if I didn’t have work to do, I would enjoy a cup of coffee, a not so healthy snack, and pick a movie that would inevitably make me cry.

Let’s circle back a little to the coffee comment. Yes, I know what you are thinking. Who drinks coffee at night? I do! I can drink a cup of coffee at night and have no problem falling asleep. I love being uninterrupted while drinking my lukewarm, black cup of coffee. Those in my tribe know my extrovertness might come easy, but I am secretly an introvert. I long for more time alone. To eat dinner by myself. To take a drive in the car by myself. But, since I have two children that isn’t possible. So, I head to my sofa—by myself.

A good snack is always a game changer. A snack you do not have to share with your children who would never eat it, but now can’t live without it because it is in your hands. A snack that you justify because it will be used to add a little extra milk to your nursing supply.

Now, to the next comment—why would I watch a movie knowing it was going to make me cry? As I have gotten older I have realized how healthy crying is. Though the saying is cliche, keeping that inside is not good for you. Some nights it might be a sniffle of a tear; other nights it might be crocodile tears.

There are few of these late night movies that I can watch over and over again and still shed a tear or two:

1. Age of Adaline. I love the storyline, I love the ending, and I love Adaline’s clothes
2. The Time Traveler’s Wife. I love this story line, I am ambivalent about the ending, and I enjoy the plot twist
3. The Notebook. Come on, you knew that one was going to be on there.

Number 3 is a crocodile tear, no matter what. Right now, our service members are being studied. Science is trying to predict the increased probability to develop dementia and Alzheimer’s in military personnel. These predictions have multiple variables, such as the number of Traumatic Brain Injuries, bad jumps, and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Whenever I watch this movie, it pulls my heart strings, and I see my husband or a friend’s husband being robbed of what little time they had with their family for it all to be taken away by a horrible disease.

Post-deployment is a unique time. Post-deployment plus COVID-19 has allowed me very little sneak away time. So, instead of heading to the sofa once my children are asleep, I’ll head to it once I know my husband is too. When he is home I tend to watch more inspirational movies.