October is traditionally a month where people turn their attention to frightening stories or horrifying images as they anticipate Halloween. While goblins and ghouls parade around town, it’s important to take a look at one of the real horrors plaguing our sons and daughters. No, it isn’t make believe tales of witch doctors or vampires, it’s the prevalence of bullying (and cyberbullying) among our youth, which has led to the designation of October as National Bullying Prevention Month.
Digital Bullying: Cyberbullying Defined
Traditional bullying conjures up terrifying images, but with the advent of mobile devices it has morphed into a nightmare of digital aggression. Cyberbullying is now reaching epidemic proportions with 87% of our children impacted by this trend. This is especially worrisome, because previous data only estimated that around 25% of our kids were affected. That means within the last year, cyberbullying rates have tripled!
Often, cyberbullying thrives on social media networks, which expose children to a larger audience of ridicule. These platforms allow our children to share, like, and comment on cruel posts, which can make victims feel isolated and alone. The pile up mentality, when combined with constant access our devices offer, is one of the most detrimental aspects of cyberbullying.
Disappearing messages and anonymous apps make cyberbullying easy to carry out attacks but incredibly difficult to stop. It’s believed that 70% of our kids will take measures to hide their activity from parents or adults. With numbers like that, it should come as no surprise that only 1 out of 10 kids seeks help from an adult if they encounter cyberbullying.
Recognizing if a Child is a Victim of Cyberbullying
Generally, victims are secretive when it comes to any form of bullying and will take great measures to keep their parents and teachers in the dark. That makes it essential for parents to understand the signs and symptoms of child who is singled out by peers.
Here are a few common red flags that a child is being bullied:
- Avoidance of technology—cell phones, gaming consoles, tablets, computers, etc.
- Overprotective of their devices
- A sudden withdrawal from peer groups, clubs, or activities they once enjoyed
- Avoids going to class or school
- Difficulty sleeping
- A noticeable change in school grades
- Dimming screens or closing windows on their devices when you walk into a room
- Increased anxiety around technology or their friends
- Shifts in mood that involve depression, anger, and fear
- Unexplained body pains and aches
- Weight gain or loss
Reporting and Handling Cyberbullying at Home
Realizing that a child is suffering at the hands of a bully is difficult to process. Feelings of rage and hopelessness might flood your senses, but there is hope. Studies show that when adults or parents intervene, bullying behaviors stop within 10 seconds. However, parents don’t need to wait until there is an issue to address cyberbullying can take proactive measures at home to protect children.
Listed below are ten ways to empower our kids with the necessary skills to combat cyberbullying:
- Know and understand the school’s policy on cyberbullying. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or support from the teachers or administration.
- If a child is experiencing cyberbullying, read all messages and comments together.
- Guide your child in how to set their privacy and account settings for optimal security.
- Know a child’s online activity. Make sure you have access to a child’s passwords, usernames, friend lists, and the sites they frequent.
- Instill a sense of social media etiquette in your children. Include relevant topics such as sexting, oversharing, and sexual predators as they age.
- Know about fake profiles. Bullies often create false identities to gain access to their victims. Strongly urge children to only friend people they know in real life.
- Always keep passwords a secret.
- Look for software that enables you access to deleted texts, browser searches, social media activity, and text messaging. This will give you an accurate insight into a child’s online presence and alert you to any hurtful comments.
- Avoid responding to a cyberbully. Silence is highly recommended for victims. Adding a comment or defending yourself will only add fire to the cyberbullies attacks.
- Finally, stress to your child that things will get better. Be there for support and guidance, but let them know that this will pass. Don’t be afraid to find counseling or support groups to help a child deal with bullying.
While cyberbullying can be terrifying, if it is handled promptly and correctly, we can prevent our children from a lot of unnecessary suffering. Bullying prevention is an important topic that needs to be addressed year round, but October is a great reminder that bullying is still an issue facing many of our children.
AWN Guest Contributor: Hilary Smith
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