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Mother’s Day for Two

Happy Mother’s Day! As we head into this day of respect for all things “Mom”, I want to take some time and celebrate the importance of the Stepmom in our families.

The term “stepmom” has always conjured images of not so pleasant women making innocent children scrub floors and clean barn muck. Why has society given stepparents such a bad rap?

I am a stepmom, and my kids have a stepmom, but I much prefer the term “Bonus Mom” or “Bonus Dad”

 

As a bonus mom, I see my role as an extra person to give love, support, and guidance to my bonus kids.

 

When they were young, I was a support to their mom and dad to backup their joint decisions. People often ask how my kids bonus mom and I get along so well? It’s easy, she loves them.

It’s hard sometimes as a mom to see another woman do “motherly” things and not get jealous.

But if we look at it strictly about what’s best for our kids; the more people that love and support them the better! 

While I know this may not work for all families, and I will say this was not always the case with ours, working together for the betterment of the kids is always a win.

Now that my boys are teens, their bonus mom and I share funny texts, shared frustrations, and foil their well laid plans to double dip the allowance pot. 

 

Being a blended family is hard!

 

It comes with ups and downs, disagreements, and compromise. It is best intentions going unnoticed and sometimes, feeling unappreciated.

That is why on Mother’s Day, I always say thank you to my kids’ Bonus Mom and wish her a happy day. Although she may not have given birth to them, she loves them and that is enough for me. 

So, to all you Bonus Moms out there…….Happy Mother’s Day! 

 

Thank you for the integral part you play in our children’s lives. 

 

 

*If you missed Rebecca’s last post, You can read it HERE!

 



Author

  • Rebecca Dills is an Army spouse of 13 years, an Air Force brat, and an Army mom. Born and raised in Colorado, she enjoys the mountains and cherishes a good rainy day. She currently lives in Charles Town, WV with her husband CSM Michael Dills, their 6 year old son, 4 dogs and 2 cats! She is an avid animal enthusiast and will quickly become best friends with any dog she meets. Rebecca and her husband have 5 older boys- three in Colorado, one in Georgia, and one who is also Active Duty. She has a bachelor’s degree in public health and works as a Project Manager for a D.C based hospital system managing research on mother and infant health disparities in the local region. Rebecca loves to write and engage in speaking events while sharing her stories of motherhood, Army life, and being an advocate for mental health awareness.

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2 Comments

  1. Katie Durgin

    You have such a huge heart, Rebecca! Very beautifully written! Happy mothers day to YOU!

    Reply
    • Kathleen Palmer

      I agree- We are so lucky to have her voice at M:M. She brings a great perspective.

      Reply

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The Gift of Military Life: Why I Feel Lucky to Be a Military Spouse

The Gift of Military Life: Why I Feel Lucky to Be a Military Spouse

I never imagined that one day I would be standing at the crossroads of challenge and opportunity, wearing the title of “military spouse” and feeling lucky. Yet, here I am, an Army wife of almost 12 years, married to a soldier, raising four incredible children (ages 10, 8, 6, and 4), and homeschooling them as we navigate the ever-changing journey of military life.

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