When you’re trying to grow a garden, there are things that are within your control, and there are things that are outside of it. You can control the type of soil you use, what seeds you buy, and the amount of water you give your plants.

You can’t control whether or not deer or rabbits come into your garden and eat your plants, or the weather, and you can’t force seeds to grow if the conditions aren’t right.

When I think of the phrase “grow where you’re planted,” these things come to mind.

It’s certainly a nice sentiment, but there are always factors that can make it more challenging to bloom in a new place. Especially in the context of being a military spouse, there are always lots of things that are beyond our control when we’re trying to grow where we are planted.

We may have to move to places that don’t have many job opportunities, or places that are very far from all our friends and family. While “blooming” can be possible in these places, sometimes it can be much more difficult.

Sometimes it can feel like we’re being asked to bloom where we’re planted when the military has planted us in a place that feels like a harsh desert, instead of a lush garden.

Almost always, it takes time for flowers and plants to bloom.

I have quite the collection of succulents, and over the years, I’ve had to repot them many times. Every time, there’s a little bit of an adjustment period where I worry about my plants, like maybe I made a mistake moving them when they were OK in their old pots.

But after a couple of weeks, I usually notice that they’re growing more leaves, getting taller, and a few of them have even grown flowers. In the same way, adapting to a new place and feeling comfortable isn’t always immediate for members of military families.

I’ve certainly had my fair share of experiences where I wondered if I would ever feel comfortable in a new place, if I’d make friends, or if I’d be able to continue my career.

Throughout the moves the Army has required of my husband and I, I’ve always been able to adapt and find my way in our new home, eventually.

It’s important to give yourself time when you’re in a new place, to get used to your surroundings and find a support system to help you bloom!

In the times I’ve put pressure on myself to immediately like somewhere new, or to find friends or a new job right away, I’ve been disappointed when those things didn’t happen.

Over several moves, it’s gotten a little bit easier for me to give myself time and space to get settled in and acclimated to a completely new place.

I’ve found that it usually takes me about a month or two to learn my way around and start feeling more comfortable living in a new place.

The reminder to “bloom where you’re planted” is a good one, as long as it’s paired with the understanding that flowers rarely bloom at a fast pace.

They need time, nurturing, and the right conditions to be able to bloom to their full potential.

As military spouses, we need the same things – time to get used to a new place, as well as resources and support to make the best of our surroundings, and to bloom where we are planted.

When given these resources and the time to adapt to a new place and cultivate new relationships, we can do amazing things, no matter where the military plants us!

EDITOR’S NOTE: Heather is so spot on with this post! As we start the month of MAY, we invite all of you to bloom where you are right now! To read more of Heather’s work, please visit her M:M Author Page.