It was a beautiful day a couple of weeks ago, and I knew I was making a choice that would impact my whole day.
I knew it would be good, but I couldn’t have known how long the ripple effect would last. Maybe I still don’t know for sure how my choice made an impact that day.
November is usually the time of year when people consider all that they have to be thankful for. We begin to express our gratitude for the important people in our lives and all the things that make our lives enjoyable. With all the ups and downs that come with military life, we sometimes need to take a step back to find the positive and this time of year is the perfect time to do it.
When taking a deeper look, there are plenty of things to be thankful for in this military journey that civilian life just can’t provide.
In this military life, separation in the military is almost guaranteed. Between TDY, training, time in the field, deployments—the list goes on and on—our service members often have to take time away from their spouses and families. Often, we focus on that separation; some of us dwell on it, some of us try to ignore it, but it can still get at us despite our best efforts.
When our service member leaves, we’re faced with two choices: allow our emotions to take over, or try to look at the bright side. It never gets easier to have our loved ones gone, but we can try to see the good in it.
I’ve been blogging for Army Wife Network for more than three years now, and if you’ve been around these parts for any length of time, you’ve likely heard about my theory as a military spouse to live out the “No-Plan Plan.”
For the most part, the No-Plan Plan pertains to the everyday milspouse stuff—the PCSes, TDYs, deployments, when the service member is coming home, what day they have off, where’ll be going next… You get the point.
Okay, you caught me. There is, of course, no right way to be thankful. There is, however, a way to jump-start the thankful feelings when you aren’t really feeling the joy of the season. Not everyone is into the holidays (for varied reasons), and that’s okay.
Recently, I turned in my notice to my job as Uncle Sam decided to move us elsewhere. I’m deeply saddened by this. I found a position within my field where I flourished and excelled. A pit of disappointment has stayed with me since the moment I realized I was leaving a position where I felt at home.
I was given the opportunity to expand the knowledge of many child care facilities across Washington, and in doing so, I hoped to have a lasting impression on the education of the children. I enjoyed the adventures in my work days that took me all across the landscape of the state. Most importantly, I met several resilient retired military spouses who shared office space with me.
If there was ever a group of people who had the right to keep on complaining, that would be military spouses.
I mean, really!
We endure cross-country (sometimes cross-globe) relocations, separations from our service members for months, spur-of-the-moment field trainings that require our beloved spouses to be gone for weeks, early mornings, late nights, travel restrictions, leave restrictions, missed holidays, and more.
My husband and I enjoyed almost four comfortable years of dwell time immediately following our marriage. Because he changed his MOS and had to do quite a bit of subsequent training, we PCS’d a lot, but we were always together. However, like most military relationships, our honeymoon eventually ended, and the dreaded “D word” popped up in our lives: a deployment was pending.
It’s November, and it’s time to start thinking about all the things I’m thankful for. There are so many things I could list this year, but one there’s one thing I’ve been especially grateful for—my child. I’m truly thankful for the opportunity and privilege to be a mother.
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