I didn’t want to look.
It was mid-Saturday morning, and I was supposed to be working on a sermon for church two Sundays away, but in a moment of final procrastination, I got on Facebook.
I shouldn’t have looked.
Some of my friends started sharing news stories about an “active shooter” in a local Walmart near our home here in El Paso and Fort Bliss.
I think most of us, whether we’ve been a spouse for one year or 20, know how it feels to be powerless in our role of “dependent.” Sometimes it feels like we’re fighting an uphill battle in our day-to-day life as our spouse trains for and fights in real battles. Many of us know what it feels like to feel completely alone. Maybe you’ve wanted to change that. Maybe you’re tired of seeing spouses tear each other down when our circumstances often do that enough already. Instead, maybe you’re looking for ways to build each other up.
Here are some stepping stones that can lead to the empowerment of one another as military spouses:
When you marry a service member, your life often becomes more about them than you. Where you live is dependent on your service member.
You must know your service member’s social security number to make medical appointments and, eventually, you rattle it off without a second thought. When someone asks for your social, it seems harder to remember.
Your service member’s name is on your ID card along with your own. For a period of time, their social also appeared on your ID card.
You can’t take charge of your move or your house without a power of attorney specifically stating that you can. That can extend to financial aspects, too.
You quit jobs because following your service member is more important to you than your career. You frequently choose love over career progression.
All of these situations can make you feel extremely dependent on your spouse. It can spark the question, “What about me?”
My mother would be shocked at the state of my refrigerator. I can count the edible items currently in there (aside from condiments) on one hand. My mother’s refrigerator has never looked like this in her whole life, if I had to guess. Somehow though, I have the ingredients on hand to make a pie—with a homemade crust, no less.
Kris Rystrom Emmert impacts audiences with her powerful message of enduring unspeakable tragedy and discovering unshakable hope. With a contagious zest for life, Kris weaves her story of loss into a life-changing encounter that inspires others to experience their own healing and uncover their God-given destiny.
Comparison is a thief.
It is destructive.
It can almost be classified as self harm when we compare our lives to those we envy.
This year has had many changes and challenges, and I never anticipated the journey ahead.
I had my second baby, and along with that came extra weight. I was lucky enough not to go through postpartum depression again, but with the ever-changing daily life and adjustment to having two small children, I wasn’t eating well and used food for stress relief, because, well…. being a stay-at-home parent, my options for stress relief are limited.
To all the Military Mamas taking motherhood “on the road” every two years, this post is for you.
Well, my friends, in the musical words of Whitesnake: “Here I go again.” Yep. It’s almost deployment go-time. (Feel free to audibly boo and hiss with me.)
But, as with all challenges in military spouse life, there is good news. Although this will be our first deployment with two kids, this isn’t our first deployment rodeo (Whew!). Of course, my brain has been cranked at full speed the last few weeks as we get ready for departure, and as I was running the other day, I realized that all this prep was like training for a marathon.
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